Talk Therapy: Restore Union in Your Hard Relationships

Feb 28, 2022

This week our topic is your choice.

As I prayed about what the final relationship focus should be, of course, things that were relevant to me came to mind, like kids and extended family members. However, I know many of you listening may not be able to relate to those, so I felt the holy spirit say, “Ask them what relationship I want to restore.” And I sense that He is going to ask you to bring up a hard relationship. You know, the one you want to avoid.

Take a moment to pause and ask God, “What relationship are you bringing up today?”

Think about that person, or group of people, as you read this month’s key verse from 1 Corinthians 13:4:

"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."

The part of this verse that stuck out to me as being relevant to relationships for today’s episode is that love is not resentful.

Resentment is a sneaky weed that lodges itself into the soil of our hearts without us even knowing it. Sometimes we feel resentment towards someone and we don’t have a solid reason as to why. It likely started with a small weed, something you thought you could just overlook, but that weed has gotten watered every time that person did or said something that struck the same resentment cord. Before we know it, that relationship is being choked by resentment and will eventually die.

To check for resentment in your relationships, ask these questions:

1. What comes up immediately when I think of this person? If your heart rate speeds up and you get a knot in your stomach (or physical response to a psychological problem) then you might have a root of resentment.
2. Can you talk about it? If you can’t talk about it, it owns you.

The fix for resentment:

1. Talk about it. To God, to trusted friends (not gossip), to a therapist, and finally to the person.
2. Bless and release (day by day)

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